Overall 2015 was a great year. I say overall because, well, nothing is ever fully good. Some mistakes were made, but let’s touch on that later.
Focusing on the good, my 2015 was spent travelling a lot. Everywhere that I didn’t go during my 2 years in army I went during my 12 months of 2015. There was Europe, India, South East Asia, Taiwan and Japan and even Australia at the end of the year. I learnt a lot from all the travelling, feeding my travel blog (which eventually ran out of storage space) and writing my way through everything. It was sustainable, I feel, although not something I may want to take up as a full time career (I realise saying this is presumptuous because nobody becomes a travel blogger through pure ability, the X-factor plays a more important role). Overall I feel so blessed to be able to do all this travelling. I am aware that not many have the opportunity to travel, for the abundance of time, money and youth doesn’t always coincide so nicely in one’s life. It has for me, and for that I have a whole list of people to thank, from friends that were willing to go out on a limb with me, to my college who was always willing to put us out in the world as well as my parents who were generous in the financing of my overseas trips. There was no way I could have put one foot out of this island on my own.
Also, I was given the opportunity to teach at my former Secondary School. It was an interesting few months, and with every class I learned more and more, and exponentially as well. I recall being so lost on the first day with all the random administration work and crazy students but my colleagues (some of whom once taught me) guided me along and made me better both in and outside the classroom. I thank them so much for that. I thank the students as well for giving me at least some respect in my time there. They weren’t the easiest bunch to handle but I don’t think I was ever too fierce, and that they knew as a basic rule to return me the respect that I gave them. I gained a lot and teaching as a career option hangs high in the horizon of possibilities.
And then university started. Studies wise I think I did alright. I was always average in all that I did, but given the astounding quality of my classmates this isn’t something to fret about. The then Dean of Students already warned us about the curse of the average, and being as such in a group that is remarkable is still, well, remarkable. I won’t go as far as to say that I want to reach for any deans list or do remarkably well. I just hope the next semester will bring with it the challenges that I crave. There’s nothing like nodding along as you write your paragraph, knowing exactly how you want to say something and finally having the courage to put it down in words for the professor to see.
And on that note, writing has been something that I wanted to do a lot of coming out of 2014 and im glad to say that I pursued it fiercely. I have a lot of questions left to answer about myself through my endeavors; namely what am I doing this for? What do I believe in? And most importantly, what is the truth? I’ve played a lot with these ideas in what I’ve written and I still don’t find my work satisfactory. There were mistakes made and I sorely regret these mistakes for once you put your work out there it can never return the moment it flows into the minds of an audience. Maybe in posing these questions I can prevent such mistakes from ever occurring again. And so my hope is that 2016 will have me one step closer to finding these answers, and in helping convey what I really want to say.
In the department of family and friends I think everything is stable, or at least stable from where I am. I’ve grown closer to my old friends and made a close group of new ones in University whom I can be myself around (you know who you guys are). I may have neglected certain groups of friends during the period of change when entering university but I don’t want to regret that too much at this point. I feel like it all balanced out eventually, and that any struggles on the interim pushed all of us closer anyway. Everything happens for a reason and as cliché as it sounds those that want to be there in your life will find a way to poke their head through the rubble after the dust has settled. That, of course, is figurative. My life isn’t that much of a mess, though my family would always be there to point out any deficiencies for my own good. And on the subject of family I believe that since university life has settled down I may want to consider going home more. We’ll see more about that, for I find it ironic that the amount of time I spend home nowadays is comparable to when I was back in NS.
Finally, running has definitely been the biggest disappointment of the year. I cannot emphasise enough how burdened I felt the entire time I wasn’t able to run. It was like something was missing within the entire time and the only way to escape was to run away yet I couldn’t. I’ve ranted about this enough but there’s good news at the end of it! I’ve been going for physiotherapy the last few months and the guy told me I should try a 10 minute slow jog soon, and so I will. I will get my running shoes on again and see how it all goes. Maybe 2016 will see me up and running, and that is my greatest hope for now.
I would love to come up with a little list of ways I want to change my character with stuff like I want to be courageous and I want to be a better me but I don’t think these resolutions necessarily translate to anything. We achieve our ideals when actions meet circumstance, and so putting it all out there is as pointless as describing a rainbow to a blind man. The change of year, enrolling into a new school, my 21st birthday; these have been largely meaningless milestones. Nothing happened specifically during those transitions. You will be the same person before and after these celebrations. It is merely the opportunities and experiences that will present themselves that matter and if these opportunities are ignored then these milestones might as well not exist. Our celebrations, then, are just hopeful cries that these opportunities will be tackled and cherished in good faith.
I feel like 2016 finds me (and hopefully you as well) in a good place, and all I hope for this year is that intention and opportunity will have the chance to meet, time and again.